cried all night til there was nothing more

A "She and Him" song that I can't get out of my head today. The lyrics go like this:

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cried all night till there was nothin more
what use am i as a heap on the floor
heaving devotion but its just no good
taking it hard just like you knew i would

oh old habits die hard when you got when you got a sentimental heart
piece of the puzzle and you're my missing part
oh what can you do with a sentimental heart!
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I'm pretty sure that song was written by a heartbroken military wife.  There are no words that can explain the heartache of saying goodbye to your spouse to deployment.  No words to hearing his sadness telling your daughter goodnight and wondering if she could possibly understand she won't see daddy for a long long time. Or the feeling of desperation and not wanting to let go of the last hug.  or begging him to stay, knowing he can't. The feeling that something is tearing apart our little family. Even if only temporary, it all seems unfair. so unnatural.

Except it is fair, I guess.  And at some point we have to just adjust.  Today wasn't that day yet.

I don't know how else to put it in words except like most difficult things in life, you can't possibly understand unless you've been through it yourself.  There is an underlying understanding with the spouses. As if we've all been through the same battle.  It's a support that is comforting on an island far away from home... but doesn't really change the lump in my throat or the ache in my heart.